Seeking inspiration

[milgreen2]

For the past several years, we've taken a long-ish vacation in the Fall, anywhere from 8-17 days, and it's always been exciting to plan. We're very fortunate to have been able to travel and see and do some of the things on our bucket list. We didn't plan anything for 2018, however, because my brother had been ill and we were reluctant to plan travel for any length of time. With trying to get in as many visits with him as we could (about a 2-hr drive away) and make the most of all holidays, etc., I didn't even miss the travel. I do, however, miss my brother terribly and know it will take time to start feeling like myself again.

Now we're looking ahead to next Fall, and although there are so many possibilities -- mostly thinking of Italy, Spain, deep in the French countryside -- I'm finding it hard to get excited about anything. Has anyone else gone through a travel slump, where you would like to travel but nothing sparks that magical feeling? Care to share any magical moments or places where you got that *aha* feeling?

 

[Pauline]

I know what you are feeling. At some point a few years ago I started to hate what I had always loved about travel - exploring new places. I realized it on our first trip to Sicily. We were doing our usual thing visiting nearby towns, trying to do a bit of walking, visiting historic sites. We were staying in Scicli in that lovely area in the south-east corner. We did a day trip to Noto and after about an hour of walking around yet another beautiful town (this one full of other tourists) I was desperate to leave. We drove to the seaside and went for a walk. The rest of the trip was good - we got to see the Greek temples that I had long wanted to see - but that trip was it for me. I lost my passion for exploring every corner of Italy.

We started traveling regularly to France about 10 years ago and at first I wanted to see every corner of that country, but that faded too. I no longer feel driven to see more countries.

For me, I think it is about getting older (I am in my mid 60s). I don't have the energy, or patience, that I once had. Also, I don't have the excuse of writing articles for SlowTrav that I had for many years. We are still traveling a lot, but we are doing things differently. We love hiking, so we do trips where we know we will be able to spend half the days hiking. We stopped going to museums. We pretty much stopped going to big cities. Some of our trips are to places where we know the weather will be better than where we live (in the UK), so we go for the walking, for the sunny weather and places where we will enjoy hanging about in the cafe (Italy!) or going out for a meal (Italy!).

All this ignores that I have fallen head-over-heels in love with a new country - Israel (not an easy country to love). I want to see every corner of that country. It meets some of my new criteria - lots of hiking, great restaurants and cafes, sunny and hot.

On SlowTrav we always said that you have to make your travel be what you want it to be, not do only what guidebook writers or travel writers tell you to do. You don't have to see their must-sees. We should also acknowledge that what we want from travel changes over our travel lives.

 

[Cameron]

After dealing with serious illness or loss of a loved one, it's easy to lose interest in things that once brought us joy.

I speak from experience, after losing my husband a few years ago. What I found healing was, to return to our favorite place, where we'd made friends. For me, that was Paris, especially since I know it well and traveling solo. Familiarity helped. Friends helped. I've gone every year. But, I wasn't inspired to go anywhere else.

One day, @Kathy, who runs European Experiences, messaged me that she had an opening on her Cotswolds Experience. While messaging with her, I jumped on the opportunity -- purchasing my plane ticket while in the midst of our conversation.

It my first group tour, but I knew Kathy and Charley had the Slow Travel mindset of getting to know a place, rather than chasing museums. I enjoyed it so much, and fell in love with the Cotswolds.

That experience was the catalyst for my inspiration to see other places and join in small group tours with Slow Travel Tours. I went on a Bluone Tour (Italy) and a Grape Hops Tour (Sicily) in 2018. I have two more tours (Return to the Cotswolds, and Luberon Walking Week) with European Experiences, booked for 2019.

So, I think rather than work hard at trying to be inspired, sometimes we have to wait for a spark of inspiration.

Best wishes!

 

[milgreen2]

Thanks so much to both of you for your thoughtful, encouraging replies. I'm continuing to research and explore the possibilities.

My husband reminded me that on some of our previous trips I was hooked on a particular artist........it is still on my mind that there's a Caravaggio in Siracusa, and we could maybe add a few days in Rome to a trip and visit the Doria Pamphilj, where we haven't yet been. And there are a couple of his works in Messina........

 

[Pauline]

I like a trip with a theme like that. For our first Israel trip we focused on Roman ruins. It helped with planning the itinerary and we ended up seeing some fantastic sites. Following an artist is an excellent idea.

 

[Tina]

I stayed over a week in Siracusa October 2017, for me Ortigia is a magical place. Almost a smalll island connected to land you can see the sunrise and the sunset every day. We found reasonably priced accommodation on Airbnb with a sea (and dawn) view, I even watched the moon rise over the sea. After watching the sunset we quickly walked to piazza Duomo because the colours of the buildings and the square in the after sunset light were incredible. More prosaically you can also visit Noto, Modica, Ragusa......And the beach and sea in the bay of Fontane Bianche are second to none, but keep to October more than September. Just a thought, for me it was a special place.

 

[chachalaca]

So very sorry for your loss, Milgreen.
Go - and just do whatever stirs your heart every day. Maybe that is just sitting in a cafe most of the morning, or exploring one day. Maybe it is sitting by a pool in grief. Have no guilt and no regrets. Go and "be".

You mentioned being interested in an artist; are you interested in cooking school? or language school? It would give you the "something to do" while also just being somewhere.

Just beginning to wonder and think about travel is good. It gives your mind and brain a much needed break from grief.

 

[italian excursion]

I would second what is shared in the previous posts regarding your lack of interest at this time in your life. And I'd add that everything is temporary, including our moods, attitudes, interests. It's sometimes rather embarrassing for me to tell people I'm going back to the same places in Italy that I've gone for more than 20 years, but I've built a community that has relationships I value, which gives me more to be excited about than just the places. And yes, I've become disillusioned at several points in my travel life, entertaining the idea of abandoning the places or people altogether, just like others have mentioned. It seems a cycle that may be inescapable.

Humans are complex; we enjoy our routines, then we are bored and want something else. Often for no apparent reason or for obvious reasons. It's a natural cycle, not surprising, especially when deep loss is involved. Sometimes it helps to honor that loss with a new tradition or reviving an old one. Maybe your brother had a favorite place or activity you could incorporate into your travel plans that livens your senses. Pauline's statement of her new interest in Israel was a stimulant for me to think about travel there; Cameron's tale about her travels with Kathy & Charlie are inspired, too. Give yourself a break, things will change again and you may rekindle your interest in travel in a new way. Or not.

Thank you for being so candid with us. Sharing here is always so refreshing.

Best,
Cheryl
www.italianexcursion.com

 

[milgreen2]

These replies have meant so much to me. I'm incubating a few ideas now, feeling that there's possibility for a meaningful, interesting and fun trip in the fall, to celebrate my beloved's 70th birthday and remind us that the days are long, but the years are short.

Interestingly, my brother really didn't like to travel all that much, unless it was for skiing or fishing. It was kind of a sore spot with my sister-in-law, who really wanted to visit Ireland or Paris, and I think he had regrets toward the end, that he hadn't done more of the things she really wanted. He would sometimes say things like "jeez, you guys really know how to travel" and I'd immediately offer to plan a trip for them.

Now that I'm writing this message, I can see the vague outlines of guilt that I'm feeling, too. Thanks to this community -- who needs therapy when we've got this? (only half kidding).